人际交往小技巧助你变身万人迷

来源：汕头美联英语培训机构时间：2019/5/15 14:52:54

We all care about what others think of us and want to be liked.How can we be liked by others?

我们都在乎别人怎么看待我们，都渴望被别人喜欢。那怎样才能被被人喜欢呢？

1. Use a Person's Name.

叫对方的名字。

Let's face it — we're all huge narcissists and we all love the sound of our own name. Learn names and make use of them. Always use an individual's name in a conversation. This tried-and-true technique is sure to increase your fan base.

我们要面对现实——我们都很自恋，喜欢听别人叫自己的名字，问问别人的名字并且用名字称唿他们，和别人聊天时要经常提到对方的名字。这个行之有效的技巧一定会为你赢得众多粉丝。

2. Smile — With Feeling!

微笑——要发自内心！

When someone offers a huge grin brimming with authenticity, happiness rubs off on its receivers. There have been many studies showing how mood, whether positive or negative, spreads between individuals. If your positive attitude brightens someone else's day, that person will love you for it.

当有人真心实意地微笑时，幸福会感染对方。曾有很多研究表明无论是积极还是消极的情绪都会在人与人之间传递。如果你的积极态度让别人都感到幸福，他也会因此爱上你。

3. Listen (Not Just With Your Ears).

倾听（不只是用耳朵）。

It's probably a no-brainer that people will like you more if you listen to them. This starts with ignoring your Twitter feed while out to dinner with friends, but goes a lot further than that. You can show you're listening to someone through body language (positioning your body to face someone and mirroring his or her stance), eye contact (giving plenty of it), and verbal confirmation (we'll talk more about this next).

如果你聆听别人的倾诉，他们就会更喜欢你，这件事可能很好理解。你可以从跟朋友出去吃饭时不看推特做起，但你需要做的还有很多。你可以用肢体语言（身体要面向对方模仿对方的姿势）、眼神交流（这个要有很多）和言语上的确认（我们接下来要多聊聊这件事）来表明你在听对方说话。

4. Use Verbal Confirmation.

言语确认。

Most psychology books refer to this technique as "active listening." Active listening revolves around demonstrating your listening skills by repeating segments of what an individual has said to you.

大多数心理学书籍把这个称为“积极倾听”。积极倾听围绕的是通过重复对方的一部分话来证明你的倾听技巧。

In speech this kind of dialogue can actually go a long way to make people like you more. It makes the other individual feel as though you really are paying attention. Plus, people love to hear their own words echoed back at them as it pats their egos a bit.

在实际对话中这种对话能继续下去并使人们更喜欢你。这会使对方感觉你真的很投入，此外，人们喜欢听到他们的话被附和，这能提高他们的自信。

5. Conversation Recall: Prove You're Paying Attention.

对话回想：证明你在注意听。

To really show someone you've been paying attention, try bringing up a topic that the person mentioned earlier. Did your co-worker talk about working with his son on a science fair project last week? Follow up and ask how it went. They don’t have to be big, life-changing events. In fact, sometimes it says more that you can recall and show interest in even the small happenings in another person's life.

为了真正表明你在注意听，你可以试着提出对方之前提过的话题。你的同事谈论上周和他儿子一起参加科学展览了？你可以接着这个话题问问他展览怎么样。他们说的可能都不是威胁生命的大事，其实有时你能回忆起他们说的话、甚至对对方生活里的小事都感兴趣才更有说服力。

6. Sincere Compliments and Plentiful Praise.

真诚的赞美和各种称赞。

As noted again by the famous self-improvement expert Dale Carnegie, individuals crave authentic appreciation. This is very different from empty flattery, which most people are adept at detecting. No one likes a brown-nose, and most people don't particularly love being pandered to. What people really want is sincere appreciation — to be recognized and appreciated for their efforts.

着名的自我提高方面的戴尔·卡内基再次表明每个人都渴望真诚的欣赏。这和空洞的奉承有很大区别，大部分人都容易发觉。谁都不喜欢拍马屁，大部分人尤其不喜欢被人迎合。人们真正想要的是真诚的欣赏——他们的努力被认可被赞赏。

7. Handle Criticism With Tact.

批评要委婉。

While you want to be generous with your praise, be stingy with your criticism. People have delicate egos, and even a slight word of condemnation can wound someone's pride. If someone makes an error, don't call that person out in front of a group. Consider praising before and after a criticism.

虽然赞扬时不该吝啬，但批评别人时要注意。人们的自尊心都很脆弱，即使一点点指责都会伤害到人的自尊。如果有人犯错误了，不要当着一群人的面说出来。你可以考虑在批评前后都称赞对方。

Another strategy for diplomatically dispensing corrections is to begin by discussing your own mistakes before digging into someone else's errors. Ultimately, aim to be always gentle with criticism and only offer it when it's truly needed.

另外一个委婉纠正别人的方法就是先说说自己的错误，然后再深究别人的错误。你的终目的就是要委婉地批评，真有必要时才给予指正。

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